I must confess. I am a simple man. I like blood, guts, and flaky crust. I know what America wants to see. America wants to see senseless violence, intersecting storylines, and pie. I said to the Thrill Editors, I said “I know what the people want” and they said “what do the people want?” and I said, you know what I said, I said “they want to see Fry. Pie. Wrestling.” A voice broke the silence, “What’s a fry pie?”
Lord Graham Gund of Castle Kenyon sits atop his sacred Hill, glass in one hand, 2020 plan in the other. Tonight, he’s hosting a gala inside the Kenyon Athletic Center, his ballroom and playpen. A week ago, a single crow tapped upon your window, a crisp envelope caught in its beak. The bird presented you with an invitation to Lord Gund’s weekend extravaganza. Are you brave enough to attend? Grab your polyhedral dice and start rolling to find out…
So we’ve all played hundreds of games of Cards Against Humanity (the party game for horrible people), and at this point, it can get a little repetitive. We at The Thrill were compelled to ask, “How can we make this game more exciting?” ANSWER: A Kenyon-relevant expansion pack! Here’s what we came up with:
It’s a Friday night and you and the home skillets are chillin’ in the dormi-glory waiting to get your freak on at the Audacious Old K, but you need a little boost before you can get yo’ swerve on. Leave Beer Pong and Flip Cup to the fools, we got your night covered—old school. Put that kiddie-shit childhood to use for some new games:
Hey there everybody. Finals week got you down? Need a little break from that paper looming over your head? Then try using the internet for what it was intended for. No, not researching 16th century French architecture for your art history final tomorrow. Distracting yourself with mindless, pedantic games to keep you from getting anything even remotely productive done!