My Ideas For Kenyon Merch But They Are Bad

Greetings my fellow purple-clad Gambier residents and Kenyon enthusiasts! With the holiday season fast approaching, there is no doubt that you are wracking your brain wondering what gifts to give. Struggle no more, because I have singlehandedly designed some unique Kenyon merch that will satisfy even your pickiest family members. I’ve pitched these ideas to the bookstore, but it is my understanding that they aren’t ready for a line of products so niche and experimental. Too bad for them. Consequently, I’m advertising them exclusively on The Kenyon Thrill. I accept payments through cash, Venmo, compliments, hugs, or basically any sort of general validation. Here are my ideas. After you see them, I’m sure you’ll have no choice but to tell me I’m good.

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Graham Gund Keeps Giving Us Stuff

This didn't fit in Graham Gund's house. So he gave it to us! (David Hoyt for The Thrill)

The statue in front of the Apple Store Gund Gallery that looks a lot like a mermaid without a tail now has a name. And it is Ariel. We wish. In fact, the statue is a French work called “La Montagne” (it means “The Mountain”), and is a lead (Don’t make your pledges/newbies/prospies lick this one, kids!) cast of a 1937 work.

It comes, like almost all the art on this campus, from the collection of Daddy Warbucks Graham and Ann Gund. So next time you see Kenyon’s own Robert Moses (he’ll probably be here for the Gallery’s opening), stop and say thanks.