“Oh $#@!”: Ways to Cope with the Housing Lottery

Will this be my future cute n fun life??? Oh God, my whole body is quivering like a plate of Jell-O during an earthquake someone help

Will this be my cute n fun life next fall??? Oh God, my whole body is quivering like a plate of Jell-O during an earthquake someone help

Have you checked your Kenyon email? Did you get your lottery number? Was it all you expected it to be and more? No? It’s awful? You’re crying? You’ve snuggled into the jersey sheets on your twin XL mattress and are refusing to emerge until after the lottery is over? Come on, little one, do not weep. Here’s a hand. Let’s get you out of that bed. Life isn’t as bad as it seems.

I want to give you a piece of insider wisdom, and I mean it sincerely. This isn’t just to assuage you or anything, I swear. Ready?

No one knows how the heck the housing lottery works.

Got it? Okay. Now that we’ve established one concrete ground rule, let’s go over a game plan:

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Behind gated off parts of Gund Ballroom, four-person NCA groups scrambled to find four more. Who will be pulled in? Friends? Enemies? Lovers?

Tensions are high as the last few NCAs are going. The four person NCAs are taken, gone for good. Voices are rising. I have seen at least one person crying. Those who were told to come at 8:30 are getting bored, and the Internet connections are going in and out. Only two questions are on these seniors’ minds:

  1. Where will they live (if they survive this ordeal)? And…
  2. When will they finish their homework?

10 o’clock list: DIY Housing Backup Plans


Hanna Hall (three-quarter view, ca. 2005), Kenyon College

Hanna Hall, aka “yeah you probably can’t live here”

Okay shhhhhh, okay shhhhhhh- I know getting a shitty lottery number is the worst. There, there please do not cry. Seriously, your snot is on my denim jacket (it’s spring I’m not wearing water repellent fabric anymore). Housing lottery woes can be stressful, and with its arrival fast approaching, we’ve got some alternative solutions to that Mather triple you’ve been simultaneously coming to terms with and dreading. Here are a few places you can try to live in next year:

1. Third Floor Ascension. The study space at the top of Ascension has it all. It’s less than a minute walk to Peirce, which means you can actually get breakfast before your 9:40. Its look is ~classic Kenyon, mainly because of those stained glass windows. And, let’s face it, those couches are way comfier than your bed.

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Housing Lottery Numbers Come Out Today, Begin Panicking

ResLife and LBIS will email out lottery numbers for the upcoming Housing Lottery by the end of the day today, which means it is officially time to start freaking out about where you are going to live next year. To help dispel as much of the chaos as we can, below we’ve put a little info on what you can realistically expect for your housing next year.  Continue reading