I don’t know what possessed me to write this today, but for some reason the amount of $100,000,000 was just on my mind and I wanted to do some Quick MathTM to see how much that could do if it was directed towards a couple different sources. If anyone is just sitting on 100M, maybe you could get some ideas?
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Okay. So, it’s the end of the semester and I’m pretty sure we’re all going through it. There are so many papers, exams, and projects that sometimes all you want to do is make an unneeded Market run or impulse buy whatever type of alien mask is at the top of your Amazon wishlist. While we at the Thrill aren’t always the biggest fans of capitalism, we can 100% relate to using our meager Kenyon wages to buy things that were 100% unnecessary. Below are some such examples of Thrill editors proving that we are all just dumb babies who should not be trusted with real money.
Everyone wants to be rich, but you don’t want people to KNOW that you’re rich. Other people just tune out your problems when you’ve got Daddy’s trust fund to soothe you to sleep on those long nights. Make sure you get the pity and compassion you deserve from the plebeians with these fun tips!
They say money can’t buy you happiness. But money can buy one large pizza from the Domino’s app after a classic Friday night spent nursing a bottle of the Market’s cheapest wine and musing on the cinematic genius that is Valentine’s Day (2010). After many weekends following this routine on a futile search for the aforementioned concept of “happiness,” numerous Kenyon students find themselves in need of a profit-making venture. However, at a college that employs three stray cats for every one human faculty-member, snagging a job ain’t easy!
This is going 2 be a tough Friday Ketchup 4 me. I am still reeling from the death of Prince, one of the greatest musicians of all time. 2016 has been a terrible year in deaths so far. David Bowie, Alan Rickman, Merle Haggard, Antonin Scalia, Lemmy Kilmister, Glenn Frey, Nancy Reagan, Chyna, my pet Asian beetle Steve, and now Prince. As a tribute 2 his Purpleness, I will be spelling as he would throughout the Ketchup today. I hope U don’t mind. It’s the Friday Ketchup.
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