It Happened To Me: My Mom Called Me A “Good Boy” For Having A Second Plate Of Dinner


Author’s Note:

Well shit. I don’t know if you’ve heard, but something’s abound and it’s not a great something. However, it’s not a world-ending something. Keep your heads, don’t be dumb. I miss you all.

The Post, For Real Now:

I am a very good boy. I don’t mean to brag, but I brush my teeth twice a day and I eat all my vegetables. I am an extremely good boy. 

That being said, it’s been a while since anyone has told me I am a good boy. Therefore it came as a shock to me when, at a family meal, my dear mother commended me for eating two helpings of dinner by saying “good boy.” This vexed me. Continue reading

Places in Ohio Named for Other Places

Places in Ohio Named for Other Places

If Ohio had a cat it would probably be named something pitiful like Fluffy or Whiskers or John Kasich because when it comes to naming our cities, we seem to be somewhat unoriginal. Not only are we using the names of other places for our places, but we’re creating the societal expectation that our Ohio version will be just as good, if not better, than the original place. I’m not saying that it’s wrong to have duplicates–I love a good twin pack of deodorant from CVS–but the Fiesta Mexicana Express on Coshoctan Ave has  4 stars on Yelp and the Fiesta Mexicana on High St. has 4.5, i.e. sometimes a duplicate doesn’t quiet live up to expectations.

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10 o’clock list: Study Abroad in Ohio!


Have the abroad experience of a lifetime without leaving the corn fields you’ve come to know and love!

Geographically speaking, Gambier is located in the Middle of Nowhere. Understandably,  some students students feel stir crazy after a few years and embark on Off-Campus Study. Dozens of programs bring to bring them all over the world, from Argentina to New Zealand!

But why explore the world when you can visit the very cities you’ve been dreaming of… without leaving Ohio? Experience cultural immersion in the very same state. Look at this multitude of options, and get in touch with the OCS Office before it’s too late!

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The Friday Ketchup


This is going 2 be a tough Friday Ketchup 4 me. I am still reeling from the death of Prince, one of the greatest musicians of all time. 2016 has been a terrible year in deaths so far. David Bowie, Alan Rickman, Merle Haggard, Antonin Scalia, Lemmy Kilmister, Glenn Frey, Nancy Reagan, Chyna, my pet Asian beetle Steve, and now Prince. As a tribute 2 his Purpleness, I will be spelling as he would throughout the Ketchup today. I hope U don’t mind. It’s the Friday Ketchup.
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BREAKING: Boil Alert Effective in Gambier



At about 5:30 PM this afternoon, Kenyon students were alerted to a boil alert for the Village of Gambier by text message and e-mail.

For those students who may not be aware, a boil alert is a a warning from the government or health authorities, and means that an area’s drinking water may be contaminated with pathogens and should not be drunk. Students should either drink bottled water, or boil their water. Water should be boiled for a full minute in order to disinfect it. Note: filters do not disinfect water. You should not brush your teeth, but you can wash your hands and bathe — just be careful not to ingest any of the water.

As of publication, the College has not issued any notice of why there is a boil alert, or when the alert will end. This article will be updated with new information.

UPDATE [9:00 PM, 4/19]: Peirce staff members got 4000 bottles of water, and have/are in the process of distributing them between the Peirce Hall, the Gund Commons Game Room and KAC Café. They are also boiling water to use tomorrow in Peirce Hall.

UPDATE [10:00 PM, 4/19]: The Office of Communications sent a News Bulletin e-mail to the campus regarding the boil alert. It reads:

A drop in pressure at the Mount Vernon Water Treatment Plant due to a change in well pumps has triggered a boil alert for the village of Gambier, including the Kenyon campus, according to village administrator Suzanne Hopkins. The village received notice about the boil alert at around 5 p.m., and the Kenyon community was informed shortly after. All tap water should be boiled before consumption. Do not consume water from drinking fountains or sink or shower faucets or consume ice from ice machines until further notice. The boil alert advisory may continue until Wednesday, April 20.

The Student Affairs staff and AVI Foodsystems have obtained bottled water, which is available for students at Peirce Hall and the Gund Commons Game Room. AVI and the Kenyon Inn are taking all necessary precautions regarding food preparation.

UPDATE [8:40 AM, 4/20]: Gambier community members are alerted via text alerts and phone calls that the boil advisory has officially been lifted.