The Academy Awards are tomorrow!!! Hollywood’s biggest, whitest celebs will get all dolled up to celebrate the biggest, whitest achievements of the year. I am by no means an authority on movies, but I am an authority on good taste in general, so I’ve filled out an Oscar ballot for the biggest awards of the night!
Welcome to the Thrill‘s version of the 2013 Oscars coverage, in which I lie on my back on a Peirce Pub couch eating miniature pumpkin pies and writing exclusively about what celebrities are wearing. My knowledge of haute couture extends from “Are these leggings too dirty to wear again?” all the way to “I can’t find my red hoodie, fuck it, I’ll just wear the gray one”, so I’m clearly the woman for the job. Read on to get your fill of Oscars fashions from someone who is in no way qualified to talk about them.
7:13 p.m. — Quvenzhane Wallis is perfect and beautiful and I love her blue dress and dog purse so much, but honestly, she could wear a flaming bag of garbage and I’d still want to steal her off the red carpet and raise her as my own.
The Purinton Primer is supposed to be a column about theatre, but I’m afraid we’re going to have to take a diversion to the land of film this week. Sorry. The Oscars were this past Sunday and I am still abuzz with excitement. You see, I love the Oscars. At my home away from Kenyon, my parents and I always have an Oscar party where there’s lots of delicious food and good friends. We all fill out a ballot where we guess the winners in all of the categories and whoever guesses the most correctly wins one of my old Little League trophies.
More on Oscar-related thoughts after the jump.
As you know unless you’re living not only under a rock but at the bottom of the sea, tonight is the 84th annual Academy Awards. There will be people in ugly dresses, people in pretty dresses and film nerds around campus yelling obscenities at various communal television sets. I’m liveblogging the event from the Caples lounge, both the show itself and the experience of watching the Oscars at Kenyon.
If you’re going to follow along at home, the full list of nominees can be found here.
11:39 p.m.: And they’re over. It was overall an underwhelming evening, but who cares? We don’t really watch the Oscars because we expect innovation. They’re just fun no matter what.
11:36 p.m.: Best Picture goes to The Artist. We all go “yup, called it,” then applaud anyway because The Artist actually was wonderful. Also, the dog is there! Continue reading