Where’s It At? w/ LFP + JZ

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Hey! Hey! Where’s it at?!

THIS WEEKEND???

Okay, enjoy some MORE old fashioned, non-video content to find out where it’s at this weekend because reading is better for you than TV.

We, LFP+JZ, stand by the statement above and intend to bring you some hot, new wave media content ASAP, but we are both just really busy right now with, like, real responsibilities. We promise to dictate your weekend plans via video within the near future. Okay, we cool?? Continue reading

Peirce Date: 2 Peirce 2 Date

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We’ve seen your comments, we’ve heard your cries, and now it’s time for—you guessed it—the return of Peirce Dates. In this classic Thrill feature, we set up two complete strangers on a blind date in Peirce to prove that love can be found among even the blandest of vaguely-Asian noodle bowls. Join us and watch as romance, or at least new friendship, blooms.

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Shh! The Official Guide to Gambier Gossip

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Evening, Upper New Siders. Are you enjoying the return of Carhartt and Blundstone weather? Well, Gambier may be getting colder, but it looks like the Kenyon intelligence market is finally heating up. I’ve overheard that some of you are getting busted for trading tips on Middle Path, so I decided to do you all a favor and hand over my top-secret guide for where and when to exchange your hot new goss. And remember, don’t even think about it without a quick little Kenyon Lookaround. You know you love me. XOXO, Gossip Thrill.

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I Ate One Color of Food a Day at Peirce and Tried Not to DIE

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Have you ever wanted to ROY G BIV your diet and ruin your life? Well, then this article is for you! This week, I forced  myself to eat only one color a day for each of my Peirce meals (which, in my case, are only lunch and dinner because I refuse to practice healthy habits or wake up before 10 a.m.). A week of pure hell ensued: tears were shed, nutrients were lost… the grumbling of my stomach could be heard for miles around. Oh, the things I do for my fans. 

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OPEN CALL: WE WANT YOU FOR A PEIRCE DATE

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Do you feel face blind when you walk into a party? Have you been cat-fished or gaslit? Do think back fondly on the simpler times when you told people they were cute on ask.fm? Are you just looking for someone to share your life with on this desolate hill? Are you jaded as fuck and eating a tuna salad in Peirce right now?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, delete your Tinder and give a Peirce Date a chance. Continue reading

A Definitive Ranking of Peirce’s Mayonnaises

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Picture this: You’re in the servery. It’s cold and dark. You’ve just finished making your 10th sandwich of the day. You go to put some sweet, sweet mayo on that baby, only to stand there, helpless as you shake the bottle for what seems like a millennia. People line up behind you, their eyes staring daggers into your back. A baby is crying somewhere in the distance. You start to sweat profusely. The room fills with your sweat, and you’re still holding onto that goddamned mayonnaise bottle, drowning, drowning, crying out for help–All right, I think you get the point. Anyone who’s been around me for more than 3 milliseconds knows of my shameful love of mayonnaise in all of its many shapes and forms. What can I say? Blame it on my heritage. Whether it be Hellman’s (for your average joe), aioli (for the more refined) or Vegenaise (for the socially woke health nuts out there), there’s nothing that a fat dollop of mayo can’t fix. Getting said mayonnaise, however, can be a humbling experience. That’s why I’ve decided to ease your Mayo Mishaps with this much-needed list!

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