10 o’clock list: Ways to Stay at Kenyon Post-Graduation

Like Bruegel’s Icarus, you may fall, and no one will ever notice. (via Wikipedia Commons)

The end is nigh, seniors. Soon you will slap on a pair of wings, and like the young Icaruses you are, you will aim for the sky. Hopefully not too high. You know what happened to Icarus because you went to a liberal arts school. Go for middle-management. Don’t melt those wings. Anyhow, for those of you who may not want to fly, there’s nothing wrong with trying to prolong the undergraduate experience for a little longer. So here are a few ideas of how you can stay at Kenyon after you graduate.

1. Trick Chef Meagan into thinking you are the twin of her unborn child. Sneak into her nursery and climb into her baby’s crib in nothing but a diaper. Hopefully she will take you in, and you will spend a second childhood being raised by one of our most beloved community members. (Though be careful that she doesn’t post pictures of you to Instagram, blowing your cover!) Continue reading

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