Breaking: 2020 Commencement Speaker Announced

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Zoinks! Have you heard the news? Students and Texans alike were disappointed when this year’s Senior Soirée went by without an official announcement of the commencement speaker, but The Thrill has some insider information. Beto “Skater Boi” O’Rourke was so very pleased about The Thrill‘s endorsement that not only has he jumped back into the race (who even knew he’d dropped out?), but he’s also decided to do something for us! That’s right, Beto “#1 Rock Band Fiend” O’Rourke is Kenyon College’s Class of 2020 Commencement Speaker! Continue reading

The Thrill’s Official 2020 Presidental Endorsement

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Photo taken right before Beto did a sick thingy down the KAC hill

Here at The Thrill, we pride ourselves on having our little fingies on the pulse of not just the Kenyon College community, but also that of the entire nation. To whom do you look to for the most accurate margarita recommendations in town? For the best places to spread rumors without being caught? For where to hold your definitely fake fight clubThe Thrill giveth and The Thrill never taketh away.

So, with your complete trust, we’ve decided to broaden our scope and announce, for the first time ever, The Kenyon Thrill‘s official, and very timely, endorsement for the 2020 Democratic Presidental Nomination (we know our audience!). Without further ado, we confirm Beto “Zumiez Employee of the Month” O’Rourke as our nominee to rock out and stand on the biggest table in the nation. Why? Well…

Reason #1:

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