How to Get Employed

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Why go to the CDO when you have a bonafide expert on getting hired right here at the Thrill? I’ve been stupid employed for the past, like, five summers. I mean, I guess Scott Layson and his crew might be able to help you, but come on, who wants to walk all the way to Gund Commons to get career advice?*

Have a sick Facebook page: If you want to get hired, make sure your employers know what a baller you are. Start by going to your Facebook settings and making your profile open to the public. Now upload photos of you doing some cool sh*t. Ever shotgun a beer on South Quad? Profile picture! Nobody is going to hire someone who can’t be a boss inside and outside of the office. Make sure it’s Facebook too and not LinkedIn; as I learned from TV, that website screams cellphone holsters.

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