It’s the season of love, my friends. Time to pull your smooch caboose close to your gnarled, scabby body and whisper unintelligible sentences of Gaelic into their ear all through the night. February 14th is the only day of the year where you get to touch other people with your real human hands, so it absolutely must be cherished. As the Beetles say, “love, love love, love, love, love, love, love, love.” Here are some tips for finding romance on Flirtation Avenue. Continue reading
Hello, young lovers. Has the appeal of the VI worn thin? Do the fluorescent lights of dormitories dull your wit and diminish your libido? Have no fear. No fear whatsoever. There Is No Reason To Be Afraid. The air is thick with leaves and the autumnal musk of gourds, and apple nog flows thick from every tree orifice. Got a cutie to eat “””food””” with? Of course you do. Celebrate autumn with your SO by skittering outside the clammy sanctuary of your room and following these simple steps.
- Prepare the food. It is time to feast, and we are hungry. If you’re an organic food nut like me (I only eat local grubs and tubers), now is the time to lay your own eggs. Remember to drink a lot of water and be sure not to clench too hard. If your flesh pouches are too weak to carry your egg bounty, a Peirce cup works too.