Senior Soiree: Expectations vs. Reality


Soiree was on Saturday night, and everyone went into it with preconceived notions passed down by seniors prior. As Summer teaches us, what you expect is never how it really is. Put on The Smiths and see how things really unfolded.*


  • Senior A — Don’t know what I’m gonna wear, but know I’m gonna get wasted.
  • Senior B — Classy and trashy.
  • Senior C — I will find the perfect dress that makes me feel both like an emerging adult and like a child at heart and I will dance the night away.
  • Senior D — “Oh my god I’m so excited but this year is going by so fast! / HELP SATAN FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK SATAN AAAAAAHH I DON’T WANT TO DIE”
  • Senior E — “mayeb i will get blisters on my feet but food and fun and friends are worth it i think”
  • Senior F — Moist and mighty, like Moaning Myrtle’s last stand.
  • Senior G — I expect Soiree to be like an Inaugural Ball: I am Michelle Obama, and Beyonce is serenading me, and being “escorted out” by “campus safety” for “stripping” will never change that.
  • Senior H — OMG. Soiree has all the elements of a popular story. It reeks of all-Americanness, tension and drama. It has romance. Pretty dresses. Dancing. Limos. College. Coming of age. I can’t wait for senior soiree. 
  • Senior I — I will walk into the room and it will be a Hermione-at-the-Yule-Ball-esque moment and everybody will see me in a different light and be like wow, I wish I had never written that mean thing on her Thrill article. [Ed. Hi, Kate. xoxo, Emma.]


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Weekend Drink: The Soiree Sipper

Here's a painting called "An Evening Soiree" only I made it better.

Here’s a painting called “An Evening Soiree” only I made it better.

GOOD JOB SENIORS!!!! Before you head to your *~super fancy dancy party time dance~*, treat yourself to a nice sip of a fruity fun bubble drink.

You’re gonna need:

  • The market’s finest champagne.
  • Pomegranate juice.
  • Lemon extract.

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Senior Soirée: Unpacking Senior Year

I idolized the senior class my first year at Kenyon. They were cool, put-together and spoke every language on the planet. When I stalked certain seniors  photos from Senior Soirée appeared on my News Feed, the image of the male seniors in slick suits and the female students in glamorous gowns and faux fur enchanted me. I fell in love with the idea of being a senior. In my Norton double, I envisioned the joys that awaited me in my senior year: drinking legally, glamorous clothes and eternal relationships. Senior Soirée was, in my mind, the capstone to senior status.

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