Uphill/Downhill: Kenyon Love and Winter

Well it’s hump day again, this week kind of feels like it’s flying by.

Uphill: Kenyon Love — While Add/Drink week is mostly over, we are still in the honeymoon period of easy classes and we are still thankful to be back for another semester on this most amazing campus. Not to get too second semester Senior on you, but I missed each and every one of you over break and can’t wait to spend another semester of communal learning and debauchery with you all. Welcome back everyone!

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Things Seniors Surprisingly Haven’t Figured Out

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Seriously though.

On Friday, we will officially have one semester left in college. We are at threat level midnight right now and I could not be more terrified. How the hell am I supposed to find a job when I can’t even say that I’ve fully figured out Kenyon yet? I’ve got a semester left, and while yes I have learned a lot, I still don’t know a surprising amount. I can’t do my taxes. I don’t know which of my shirts need to be washed in cold water (I have five shrunken sweaters to prove that one). Above all, after four years I’m not sure I even know what justice is even though I’ve been questing for it pretty much my entire time here.

Good news is, we are way way ahead of the first years. Those kids don’t know anything about anything (even though they are the future of Kenyon and we are just humble Seniors who remember when Papa John’s could deliver to your door). It’s time we really widened the gap and wised up on a couple of things.

Here are a few of the items, rules, common practices that even the Seniors still haven’t figured out yet:

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It’s Way Too Effing Late To Be Applying For Jobs But I Am So It’s Okay (A Guide To Last-Minute Job Applications)

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So I’ve been having a lot of nightmares in which all my teeth fall out. It’s very upsetting. According to the Internet, the root of these dreams tends to be a sense of powerlessness, which totally makes sense since I’m graduating in 2 weeks with no job.

Here’s the deal: the one, single, big, dumbo goal I had for this entire year was to get hired. Really and truly, all I’ve ever wanted was to walk across that stage and receive my diploma with some semblance of a future. And despite the implications of this post’s title, I have been making an effort. In addition to sending out a number of applications for jobs I can’t afford, I have: Continue reading

The Class of 2013 Remembers

Ah. Nostalgia.

[This article was co-written by Eve Asher ’13.]

Hey class of 2013, remember how when we were first-years everything was awesome and fun all the time? And now everything is terrible? What could explain this? Certainly not us getting old and jaded. Must be that the school’s changing. Mhmm. Yup. Remember these relics of happier times?

The Bexleys. When I was a first-year I used to dream of one day living in a Bexley. You see, kids, where now stands a field of enormous gleaming cookie-cutter houses, there was once a street lined with modestly sized, kinda run-down cookie-cutter houses. They seemed so glamorous and adult compared to my room in Gund. But the NCAs make the Bexleys look like the New Apts. Also the NCAs don’t host a sweet block party, which is a real shame.

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