Starter Packs for the Mods

north mod sp

This post was co-written by Colleen Kemp ’20 and Sarah Hoffmann ’20.

Ah, to have a library. Somewhere to study, sleep, nap, slumber, doze off, daydream, nightdream, and flirt with the 1,661 other people wearing rolled jeans and oxford Docs. And to think that, as a senior, I’ll never be able to again experience the supreme joy of a periodicals lap or a truly quiet study space! For me, it’ll always be mods all the way down. To commemorate/mourn this grim reality, here are some starter packs for the physical embodiments of Kenyon’s evil stepmother, the modular units.

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10 o’clock list: Who Studies Where on Campus

via Wikimedia Commons

Library grumps are some of the best Kenyon people I know, and I know a lot of Kenyon people. But who are the library grumps? What makes them tick? How is a library grump different from a Gund Commons giggler and how are both united by a shared hatred of study-space ignorant homework completers? In this list, I won’t answer any of those questions, but I will make sure you get up to speed on the various Kenyon study space populations. This way, when you have an interaction with a steely-eyed, Adderall popping Junior, you’ll know exactly where to flee afterward.

Note: this list is not intended to enumerate the existence of every single study spot on campus, only to characterize the students who study in the listed locations.

  1. Gund Ballroom– First years. And people pulling serious all-nighters who live North.  Continue reading

Stock Answers For Questions Your Parents Ask You Every Week

“No, mom, I’m totally getting to bed by ten each night.”

Being the parent of a college student must be stressful. For the first time since their birth, baby is out of reach, on a campus full of drunken heathens and at risk for communicating with radical academics who salivate at the chance to indoctrinate them into an anarcho-communist lifestyle. To make up for the lack of physical contact, parents try to call their college students at least once a week to check up, just to make sure baby is still alive.

The questions they ask never change. I’ve become convinced there is actually a script parents use for talking to their college aged kids. To help even the playing field, here are some stock answers to the questions parents love to ask. Continue reading

Club Olin Has a (Criminal) Meeting Room

All the cool kids study here.

All the cool kids study here.

Guys, I go hard at Club Olin, all the time. So when I discovered a room in Chalmers that I didn’t know about, I was like, what?!

The room I discovered just this past week, the Ringwalt Room, is tucked away on the second floor of Chalmers. To find it, walk straight past the circulation desk and hang a left after the microfilm (now there’s a sentence I never thought I’d write).

So what’s this oaky, pedagogical paradise for?

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10 o’clock list: “College Problems” from Last Week

homeward bound

We’re almost homeward bound. Did you finish the year with a splash?

The week before finals week was bound to be a stressful one. Take a study break while we examine last week’s crises.

1)    The Internet went down. So did my life. First it was isolation and denial: “No, it can’t be down. Everybody else is still studying. Omigod it’s just me.” Then it was anger. And growling. Then it was bargaining. “Maybe I can get on Facebook from Kenyon’s homepage. NO? Kenyon.efff.u!!” Then it was a deep sadness, in which I simultaneously tried to reload Netflix, Facebook, and Gmail for a half-hour. Finally, acceptance: “Well… I guess I can go talk to people…I guess.” Continue reading

10 O’Clock List: Five Totally Not-Boring (And Terrible) Study Tips


There’s no originality in study habits anymore. Every list of the “Best Ways to Study” tells you the same basic tips over and over and over and over. I know I should review my notes after class, start studying more than a day in advance of exams, find a study space, and make flash cards. I basically have that stuff tattooed into my brain by now. It’s boring. In the spirit of originality and daring that Kenyon holds so dear, here is a list of some new study habits to try out. (Please, for the love of God, don’t actually try these out.) Continue reading

Kenyon Dominating Once Again!

Once again, Kenyon has been recognized for going above and beyond the peons of the collegiate system by being the best at something.  This time, it’s for studying.  Kenyon ranks the highest for study time among college seniors, according to the Washington Post.  The explanation the article gives is that we apparently have small classes and give senior exercises.  Quoted in the article is Provost Nayef Samhat:

“When you have nothing but small classes from the beginning to the end of your career, and you need to participate, there is an expectation that you will be prepared.”

I think we should all raise our afternoon beers and salute our unemployed selves for yet again getting a national shout-out.  I’m a total rankings lover and am giddy at the fact that we are (again) quantifiably awesome.  Not only do we have the best campus (irrefutably) and the best professors (also irrefutably), but now we are also the best at the menial task of studying.  Good work, Kenyon!