Vegetables that have been sassy to me lately

An orange is not a vegetable .

An orange is not a vegetable .

Those veggies have been giving me the stink eye. Also they make my breath stinky. Really puts a damper on my social life. So here are the biggest offenders:

  • Spinach — It gets in my teeth.
  • Tomatoes — A fruit masquerading as a cucumber.
  • Cucumbers — Just think about it. A cucumber is a cucumber until it’s a pickle. Weird, right!
  • Water chestnuts — Why are you in everything! (I’m not positive what a water chestnut is.)
  • This manatee — Too friendly. Like I get it, you’re cute. Like actually you’re super pushy.