So, on Valentine’s Day, the day of ~l o v e~ and happiness and whatever the hell people who experience romantic attraction do that day, I sat down in New Side with Marc Delucchi and asked him a lot of semi-serious, semi-invasive questions. These are the results.
This Valentine’s day, get her what she really wants. New from the Thrill, WheresItAt? perfume will have you smell like you have clout.
*clink*
Hello lovers. Welcome back to Peirce Dates, an old segment that we recently brought back for this day of blind Cupid’s arrow, my favorite holiday and your’s: Valentine’s Day. We at the Thrill love love, and to celebrate it we set two strangers up on a blind date in Peirce dining hall, the most romantic place on planet Earth and also planet Mercury, believe it or not.
alamy babyyy
Sure we’ve all heard of oysters, strawberries, and chocolates as aphrodisiacs, food to fuel your sex drive. But if you’re on a budget this Valentine’s Day and still looking to get sultry with a special someone, we all know that fresh fruit and seafood is hard to come by in the servery. That’s why we here at the Thrill have put together a list of alternative Peirce aphrodisiacs that are sure to liven up the libido. Alternatively titled, a List of Foods to Get You in the Mood, here’s the Thrill’s science certified list of Peirce foods to help make this year’s Valentine’s day extra sexy and special.
Are you looking for someone to keep you warm in the midst of this polar vortex? Are you pining for luvvv? Well lucky for you, the Thrill hath a way. Let us set you up on a luxurious blind date at Peirce at no cost.
You can volunteer yourself or your friend by emailing us at thekenyonthrill@kenyon.edu!
Check out all our past Peirce Dates here.
Candy heart is 2 real
Readers, friends, lovers, do not worry. I, too, am VERY upset that Valentines Day 2017 has come to a close. Second only to Groundhog Day, Valentine’s Day serves as the source of most of my joy. Yes, I said it. Why? Every year on February 14th, the apathetic layman is inundated with colors, scents, and feelings of love; heartfelt or not, one iota of this stuff is bound to diffuse into his consciousness. He feels the love. You feel the love. Suddenly he is texting, “I love how your hair puddles around your shoulders in inky rivulets” as opposed to, “U up? ;)” Now you’re looking at properties in the area, unsure about the 2-bedroom townhouse, because maybe you want space for two or three kids. You decide to get a dog together and try caring for something other than yourselves for once. Next thing you know you’ve purchased a trunk load of flat-pack furniture from IKEA, five Flärdfulls and two Riktig Öglas in total. What was I saying?
Anyway, V-day can be nauseating. Check out these tunes.
Cool Company- Call You Back
This jiggly hit will speak to those who really (seriously) only want to hook up. The lyrics speak for themselves.
“Don’t you think we would be perfect together?
No.”
The only way to survive Valentine’s Day
Whether you have a significant other, that one hookup you always text to “hang or something,” or are single and spending the holiday with friends or alone, you’re going to need an especially strong drink this weekend. For you of-age readers, instead of getting cavities from the ridiculous sweetness of “love” and annoying lovey-dovey nicknames, take of sip of the true heart of Valentine’s Day. Like love, it’ll be sweet at first but over time may just leave you bitter.
