10 o’clock list: How to Get out of Bed When it’s Cold Out

Alright, alright, we get it. It’s cold out. It’s January. The temperature is dropping, it’s the year of the monkey, and mercury is still in retrograde. Lot of things going on right now. And to make it worse, you have to muster up the courage to get yourself out of bed and join the rest of society every weekend. But have no fear, I’m here, and I have ways for you to get off your booty and brave the cold.

1. Tell your blankets how much you love them. It’s like kissing your parents before getting on a plane. You’ll feel a lot less guilty drinking Keystone in Old K knowing that your bed is happily waiting for your return.  Continue reading

Talking Back to Yaks

Talking Back to Yaks

Remember Yik Yak? Didn’t think so. But we do. Oh boy do we remember the era of the Yak. While its time at Kenyon has definitely slowed down from an olympic sprint to a comfortable trot, that doesn’t mean there aren’t perfectly reasonable questions out in its sphere of existence. We’re stepping in and helping those lost souls.

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You should probably get to know the girl on a friend-level before you decide to ask her out. Track her amazon purchases to see what kind of shampoo she’s buying. Sit three tables over from her to make sure you know what she gets in her salad. Once you’ve memorized her sleep/breathing patterns–start conversations about common interest! It’ll be love at 76th sight.

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