If you are a human student on campus right now and you are in some sort of group affiliated with something, the chances are that you went to a formal this weekend. Everyone and their brother got dressed up this weekend for a prime showing of “Stilettos on Ice” as they shuffled determinedly down the Middle Path death trap in order to enjoy The Last Weekend Before Finals. Yet there were also a chosen few organizations that didn’t penguin down the ice luge toward the promise of champagne and revelry, and I am here to give them a voice make up reasons why they didn’t have formals.
1. KCET– So this is how I see this scenario going: due to inclement weather, the Kenyon College Equestrian Team was unable to drive their horses in from the Barn. Since you can’t have a respectable KCET party without horses for dates, this club unfortunately had to cancel at the last minute. Read more…
There I was, minding my own business, when strange things started happening around my room. Fake candles being turned on. My door slamming suddenly. Someone watching Call the Midwife on my Netflix. Why? Philander Chase’s ghost was just burning to, once again, answer the pressing questions of Kenyon students and knew just who to haunt to get it done. Afraid that my life would turn into The Conjuring if I did not oblige him, I collected several questions and answers with practical advice from Kenyon’s founder.
I’m a senior and my resume is terrible. I don’t know how I’m going to find a job and I’d rather jump off a bridge than move back in with my parents. What should I do?
Philander Chase’s ghost rolled his eyes. Maggots were behind them. Luckily, they didn’t get on my desk. He then responded with, Read more…
Mulligan – v. A mulligan, in a game, happens when a player gets a second chance to perform a certain move or action. The practice is also sometimes referred to as a “do-over.” (via Wikipedia).
Folks, you might have noticed the foul stench of stress seeping through the doors of Olin. The time has come to just mulligan that class that you’ve been struggling with all semester. Let your freak flag fly–you don’t need that Existentialism final dragging you down. Here are some pro tips on mulliganing a course: Read more…
Here at The Thrill, we take pride in reminding you of your most awkward moments at Kenyon. Since we won’t be with you over the holidays, here’s a little present from us to you: The Holiday GIF Guide, in which we catalog all of your worst holiday moments…before they even happen.
Our colleagues at the Collegian report that a former student, acquitted this summer of sexual assault charges, is suing Kenyon over its handling of the case, as well as his accuser and a Sexual Misconduct Advisor.
Check out the Collegian’s story here.
Well, we’re finally here, the last weekend of the semester (in spirit, if not calendar wise.) So before we all descend into the nail biting, paper writing, sleep fighting extravaganza of a pit that is the next two weeks, we’ve got one last chance to go out with a bang. So let’s end on a high note, whether you’re going out to every party you can find, or just having a low key evening with a few friends, here’s a drink to keep you warm if you venture out into the Arctic landscape that Kenyon has become. Or at least until some of the snow melts off and turns Middle Path into one giant lane of muddy slush. Yay.
The time has come.
It’s the holiday season!
Which means it’s time to start showing people you love them with material things. Because that’s what true love really means.
But in case you
don’t really love the person love the person so much you don’t know where to start, here’s a little cheat sheet* that will get your gears turning. Read more…