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Bye for Now

May 13, 2016


It’s that time of year again. The weather is finally nice, finals are over, and if you don’t leave your room by noon on Saturday you’ll get fined out the wazoo. Time to move out for a few months, and see what happens to your body when studying five hours a day is no longer necessary.  Read more…

The Friday Ketchup

May 13, 2016


See below for an important message. Read more…

Drunk Comps, Vol. II

May 12, 2016

As you may have heard, comps season just wrapped up. Read more…

10 o’clock(ish) list: Things You Can Do Now That the Boil Alert is Over

May 11, 2016
Renowned writer and editor Jack Quigley '16 bathes in the freedom of an unregulated water supply.

Renowned writer and editor Jack Quigley ’16 bathes in the freedom of an unregulated water supply.

We did it, Kenyon. We survived not one, but TWO water-related crises. We broke out our electric kettles and used them like we never had before. We ruined CHIPS water bottles and turned ordinary recycle bins into Snapchat-worthy installation art. We skillfully exploited a countywide problem solely affecting tap water, using it as an excuse to avoid classwork, KAC workouts and the terrifying behemoth that is Peirce Hall. We didn’t just survive; we THRIVED.

But now, the boil alert is over. And that’s pretty cool, too, wouldn’t you say? What? No? You miss the excitement of avoiding contaminated H2O at all costs? You miss the crunch of cheap water bottles as they crinkled and bent in your grasp? You miss the intrigue? The excitement? The thrill of it all?

Let me remind you: This boil alert was a heckin’ nuisance. You can do so many great and good things now that it’s over. Do I need to spell them out for you? Fine. I will, but only because I have to. Read more…

Overheard at Kenyon: Finals Week

May 11, 2016

Hello hello! Welcome to another edition of OVERHEARD AT KENYON, where we tell you all the weird and whimsical things your peers have been saying around campus. This week, due to finals and such we have lots of special gems for you!

Read more…

Weekday Drink: A Grand Final(e)

May 10, 2016

It may look unassuming, but it packs a punch (via

It’s Tuesday of finals week and Club Olin is poppin’. What are you supposed to do when all the spots in Periodicals are taken (yes, even the middle seats that no one is supposed to use)? Drink, of course. But drinking during finals week is irresponsible, you cry, although you were probably already crying because of your workload, anyway. Whatever, loser. This drink is sure to get you feeling good. Read more…

BREAKING: Yet ANOTHER Boil Alert Issued In Gambier

May 10, 2016


At about 12:25 PM this afternoon, Kenyon students were alerted to a boil alert for the Village of Gambier by text message and e-mail.

For those students who may not be aware, a boil alert is a a warning from the government or health authorities, and means that an area’s drinking water may be contaminated with pathogens and should not be drunk. Students should either drink bottled water, or boil their water. Water should be boiled for a full minute in order to disinfect it. Note: filters do not disinfect water. You should not brush your teeth, but you can wash your hands and bathe — just be careful not to ingest any of the water.

As of publication, the College has not issued any notice of why there is a boil alert, or when the alert will end. This article will be updated with new information.