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Hacks for Finals Week Because Everything is Falling Apart

May 7, 2016

that guy in the yellow looks 30 right but anyway finals week am I right!

Nick Petricca said it best in the lines of the fateful pop hit Anna Sun (re: this house is falling apart) when describing Kenyon’s finals week vibe. Morale is low, clouds are over everyone’s head (literally and figuratively), and everyone is drowning in work. We’re all in one big swamp of a pile of work and no one has any hope. We’re fine though. Do you know why we’re fine? Because we have hacks. That’s right. Easy, little, simple details that make this week a lil more bearable. Let’s get started.

Bookstore Ice Cream Happy Hour: Your favorite local bookstore will be having half-off ice cream from 10-11 every night this fine finals week. Get a cone with a pal, sit on the side walk, and don’t look at a computer or book or scholarly journal for a second. Take the ideas of the masses and concentrate them, then go to the masses, persevere in the ideas and carry them through, so as to form correct ideas of leadership – such is the basic method of leadership.

Free Coffee at the Bookstore: That’s right! Free coffee all week at the bookstore. Grab a cup on the way to your final or grab your sixth during one of those dreaded all-nighters. They get it, and they’re here for you. If there is to be revolution, there must be a revolutionary party. Without a revolutionary party, without a party built on the Marxist-Leninist revolutionary theory and in the Marxist-Leninist revolutionary style, it is impossible to lead the working class and the broad masses of the people in defeating imperialism and its running dogs.

The couch room on 3rd floor in Olin Library: Take a nap on one of those sweet leather couches. You’ll melt right in. You deserve that relief even if it’s just for twenty minutes. The Communist Party of China, having made a clear-headed appraisal of the international and domestic situation on the basis of the science of Marxism-Leninism, recognized that all attacks by the reactionaries at home and abroad had to be defeated and could be defeated. When dark clouds appeared in the sky, we pointed out that they were only temporary, that the darkness would soon pass and the sun break through.

The seminar rooms in departmental houses: Take a break from the looming pit of despair that is Olin library, and get your hands on a seminar room. Those babies have couches, tables, and sometimes even a fridge. It feels like you’re working at a friend’s house instead of a library/machine environment. Feel like a human you deserve it. The masses have boundless creative power. They can organize themselves and concentrate on places and branches of work where they can give full play to their energy; they can concentrate on production in breadth and depth and create more and more undertakings for their own well-being.The masses are the real heroes, while we ourselves are often childish and ignorant, and without this understanding, it is impossible to acquire even the most rudimentary knowledge.

One Comment leave one →
  1. anon permalink
    May 7, 2016 1:53 pm

    oh my god. i feel so sorry for the people who skim past this article, never realizing what they have missed

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